happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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