we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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