Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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