they need to just BURY HIM!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
