I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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