why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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