why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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