So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
