Sponge bath it is.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize