i can't believe i had my finger in that
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Drunk is not a location!
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
