he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
