So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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