girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
