She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Randomize
