He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize