i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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