i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
