"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
the liver wants what the liver wants
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
