My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize