So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize