he thought i was a dude.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize