I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
