jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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