Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
