I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
