My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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