We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
