All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
did i just pee glitter
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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