Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Randomize
