A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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