So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
