i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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