We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
