is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
