so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Randomize
