You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
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He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
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He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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