I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
ttyl tear gas
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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