And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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