im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize