remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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