New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
