They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my parents said I crawled through the house
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize