I must be too annoying 4 u.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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