...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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