Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
