omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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