we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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