I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
