Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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