Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
