Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Randomize
